Alright I'm just on here to rant.

I don't understand how you can be so contradictory.
"Elaine, you're so fat and ugly. No boy will ever want to date you. LOOK at your waistline. You SEE all that fat? OMG You're so fat! Why don't you care about what you look like? You're so ugly. Can you at least TRY to be a girl?"

I dress slightly-fashionably...

"OMFG WHAT ARE YOU WEARING?!?!? ARE YOU TRYING TO BE A WHORE?!?! TAKE THAT OFF RIGHT NOW! ONLY SHAMELESS PROSTITUTES WEAR SLEEVELESS SHIRTS! DON'T YOU EVER WEAR ANYTHING LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN! WHAT?! THAT SHIRT IS AN INCH TOO LOW! TAKE IT OFF! YOU CAN ONLY WEAR PAPER BAGS OR DRESSES THAT ARE MADE FOR PREGNANT WOMEN THAT I (YOUR FATHER) WILL BUY FOR YOU AT COSTCO EIGHT SIZES TOO BIG!"

WOW it's been a long time since once of these things popped into my email: ELSA.

>RANDOM QUESTIONS
>
>1. What's your favorite color? the colors of the ocean: light turquoise, sky blue, that rich blue, white and when it comes to football: red
>2. What/who is your favorite band/ singer? MCFLY!!!!!! All About You!!!
>3. tea or coffee? i like iced tea and english tea, but I don't drink it that often. Yes I'm asian and I hate asian tea. I love that fattening frapp stuff from starbucks though. i really don't care. if it has enough sugar in it, i like it
>4. dr. pepper or coke? EW I HATE DR PEPPER
>5. What is your favorite movie? the Lord of the Rings, parts of Tristan and Isolde, Franco Zefferrelli's Romeo and Juliet, Anne of Avonlea, etc
>6. favorite actor/ actress? johnny depp is beyond compare; he can be anybody. i really like viggo mortensen and eric bana too
>7. What is your favorite season? 75 degrees Fahrenheit, cloudy with a bit of sunshine.. so probably spring (with allergy medicine provided) or english summers
>8. Do you like poetry? i LIVE for poetry!
>9. Do you want to go to college? england please!
>10. Do you drive? not well... yet
>11. Do you have a job? troy
>12. Sandals or sneakers? SANDALS!!!!
>13. reading a book or watching t.v.? a healthy combination of both; usually books though it depends on my mood
>14. Do you like anime? EW NO. and YES i said that hayley
>15. What's you favorite anime? EW
>16. Do you read manga? EW
>17. fav. manga? EW
>18. Do you like the person who sent this to you? ELSA! MY KINDRED SPIRIT!
>19. Will you send this back to the person who sent this? well she'll read it.. at least she better
>20. Would you be classified as a nerd or idiot? haha both, at the same time
>21. What is your favorite song? "Too Close For Comfort", by a mile. it's on repeat
>22.Do you love your friends? most of them
>23. What's your favorite food? noodles
>24. Where were you born? San Francisco
>25. Do you have more than 20 c.d.s? haha just go pick a pile and you'll find mroe than 20
>26.Are you a writer or an artist? Writers are artists, thank ye very much, but if you were talking about "artist" as in the sense of Van Gogh or Monet, then writer, most definitely.
>27. Hamburger or hotdog? burgers
>28.What's your favorite number? 7, 8, 17
>29. What is your full name? Elaine Teng
>30. Do you like your middle name? don't have one
>31.Do you write in cursive or script? both, depending on the mood and whatever my hand feels like doing. when i'm writing to friends it turns out into a jumble of both, as vicki, elsa, and amy would testify
>32. Apple juice of orange juice? orange, with no pulp
>33. Eggs or pancakes? pancakes. EW i hate EGGS WITH A PASSION
>34. Do you like or love or hate ramen noodles? NOODLES!!!!!!!!!
>35.Do you have a lot of friends? i guess. i love them
>36.When is your birthday? March 22... in britain it would be 22/3 (thanks for confusing me)
>37. How long are you on the computer a day? like a minimum of 4.5 hours each school day; from when i get home to sleep
>38.pants or skirts? pants
>39. Have you ever been to a wedding? nope
>40. Have you ever been to a funeral? one in china
>41. Do you cry in front of people? yup
>42. What is your favorite flower? I am cheesy and LOVE the red rose, mixed with white ones. Thistles! Heather! Remind me of the English countryside! OOO and I've recently developed an affection for camellias.
>43.Do you stay up all night? with vicki yes
>44. Spontaneous or a planned out person? both, at the same time
>45. Do you like your picture to be taken? i'm a camera whore. i don't care what i look like cuz i figure 20 years from now i'll wish i had more pictures of myself as i was. i can't stand people who wont' let you take pictures of them cuz they don't look "pretty".
>46. Have you ever played in a car wash in the middle of the night? uh no.. i should add that to the list of things to do before i die
>47. Have you ever eaten marshmellow cream straight out of a jar? ew i don't like marshmellows
>48. How long is the longest you've ever been awake? uh for the Lord of the Rings.. 30 hours
>49. Xanga or freewebs? blogs!
>50. msn i.m. or aim? AIM!

Flippin Andy whil being drunk and high and lazy and tired and stupid all at the same time, hit the hammer on the head or Elaine in the heart as directly as you can get.
What was it that he said. It went something like this:
Elaine, this whole obsession with McFly is unhealthy. You feel unsatisfied with your life right now and you're missing something you really want and McFly's your way of filling that emptiness. You hide in them because that's the thing you want most. Go find yourself a man Elaine. You need a man.

Alright he said it alot more eloquently even in his drunken stupor, except for the last "man" part.

So what if they are? I don't like the way things are going right now. I don't like it these days. I want to be somewhere else. Amy says she's just completely ready to go move to New York for a year. I'd be completely happy to live in London for a year. Or Liverpool or Manchester.

*sigh*

I love McFly. Their version of "You've Got A Friend" is so sweet.

PUDDING VICKI! PUDDING!

Alright.
Time for Rant #2:
Inspiration:
Dreams we have as kids all fade away
-Danny Jones; McFly; "Don't Know Why"

So we all have dreams. Dreams about boys (Danny). Dreams about the future. Dreams about the impossible. Dreams about just about everything.
Most of the dreams don't come true and as each one fades away another one takes its place.
The dreams we have spring from our desires. What makes the loss of one dream so much more painful than another? Was it the fact that we always knew it was impossible? I don't think so. I didn't think it was possible that Camron would ever like me. Not one chance in a billion years. I am finally completely over it and I really do mean that, Kathleen, who never reads this anyway but just for the record. I knew he'd never like me, ever, but it still really really really hurt when he did some of the things he did or said some of the things he said. You'll argue that, "Well Elaine. There was a chance that Camron might have gotten hit on the head really hard and liked you. That's why it still hurt. It doesn't hurt that Steven Gerrard is getting married in three months does it?" *sniff sniff* He is not getting married damn it. Back on topic, wow. This wasn't even the direction I was going in my head so you could probably just ignore what I just wrote.
So this was originally inspired by a conversation Michael and I had about dreams. I was having serious England withdrawal problems that night and he just was being Michael.
It hurts the most to realize that your dreams aren't all that you made them out to be.
For example, England isn't as perfect as it is in my head, and I know that. But the difference isn't night and day (I hope) and a part of me does fear that. What I've wanted my entire life, living in England, if/when it actually does come true, it won't be what I dreamed it to be. That might be a good thing as in the difference was good, but what if I hate it? What then? The disillusionment that people go through when their dreams are shattered can break them.
I don't even know what my point is here. I'm just in a weird, contemplative, quiet (yes I know elaine quiet) mood.

Alright so lately I've been weird. And yes it has been embodied in McFly, to the annoyance of you all. I don't know what it is but I've been having this extremely independent streak. When my mom drives me somewhere I wish I could be driving. I wish I could just get in and go wherever I want to go whenever I want to. I wish I didn't have to answer to anyone or be connected and tied down. That leads to the whole England thing. I really want to be in college, but I know that when high school ends I'll sob my eyes out and miss it forever.
On Saturday I spent the night at Vicki's house. Yes that's two weekends in a row. My mom was complaining about driving me since she lives in Orange.
mom: First there's Matthew. Now you have another English person. At least Matthew lived close.
me: Well if you don't want to drive me, you could always just buy a plane ticket to London Heathrow for me. And I'll make it easy for you: ONE WAY.
mom freaks out: WHAT?! Are you SERIOUS? What's wrong with you? Do you seriously want to go that bad? Would you come back?
me: Nope. Why would I come back?
mom: What?! But how will you live?
me: *shrug* I'll get a job.

Yeah she freaked out after that. Elaine volunteering to get a job is something unheard of. She's afraid to let me go to England now. She thinks I'll never come back.

I just don't want to be here. I don't know why. Raging hormones or what. I just want something new, something more. I want to be on my own (eponine!). It's probably just a phase and I'll get through it. When I do get my license and stuff, I'll probably miss it. But then again, my dad still wouldn't let me go anywhere anyways.

Remember when we scratched our names into the sand
And you told me you loved me
But now that I find
You've changed your mind
I'm lost for words
Everything I feel for you I wrote down on one piece of paper
The one in your hand
You won't understand
How much it hurts to let you go

Was I invading in on your secrets?
Was I too close for comfort?
You're pushing me out when I wanted in
What was I just about to discover
I got too close for comfort
Driving you home
Guess I'll never know

Yes Elaine's favorite song.

Elaine is gearing up for TWO long, emotional/philosophical rants.

Brace yourselves.

It's interesting how much can change within six months. How many friends fall apart, how many people you don't talk to anymore, how many new people you're friends with. You look back on notes, pictures, blog posts, and just other memories and it's just incredible how different things are.

I've asked around and everyone notices but no one says anything. We never play cards anymore. That fell apart after Camron and Ashley got together, because you can't really play cards without Camron. Then the whole Elaine-Matthew debacle shot a freakin nuclear bomb through the group. We didn't like being at the table at the same time, and so I actually went to my clubs and he went more and more to his new asshole friends. And yes they are assholes. I respect Michael Tamplin's intelligence more than anyone else's, but I don't respect how he acts. Gleb is the same. He can be a really nice guy, but when they're together they're so freakin stupid. "LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL" with a stupid look on your face. How much more messed up can you get? O yeah, I'm going to slap myself for fun when people are annoyed with me and blast German techno on every speaker available and reassemble comp sci computers so that Diana's doesn't work anymore. Somehow they are attractive to Matthew. Whatever floats his boat then.

I remember when we couldn't all fit at the table and we used to yell at each other to move over or squeeze. I remember when I had to fit my huge ass between the two seats. That's how crowded it was. Now, I go there and it's only Michael. So when I get there, I drag people there. Shayne's been sitting with us the past two days because I've dragged him over. Yogin's there if I'm there usually. Andy turns up once in a while when he has no where else to go. Robin doesn't come over much from the badminton people because Jeff Bosboom somehow thinks he can turn up there now and be stupid. Vicki turns up sometimes. But it's just not the same. I mean I love all the people there, with the exception of Bosboom, but it just isn't the stupid, eclectic group it was. It's just a bunch of my friends tied together loosely in this big conglomeration and the only thing they have in common is that they go to Troy and they like to make fun of Elaine, which is fun but still.
Not to degrade any of my new friends because they are awesome like no other. Shayne is the most awesome person alive. I would so marry him just to talk to him, as weird as that sounds. I just like being around him because somehow we always have fun, despite our polar opposite personalities. Actually, I think it's because of it that we do. I don't know what I'll do next year if he's not in my english class. He's like the one person always completely capable of making me giddily happy without even trying. According to him, he just insults me because somehow I get angry/offended and then three seconds later I'm hysterically laughing. I so do not agree with that statement! Vicki is one of my closest friends now in all her blonde glory. She's awesome and I heart her. Amy is the most eclectic person I know and we can talk about anything and though we rotate around completely different spheres, we get along.

All my old friends are still somewhat tied together by the bus. But even that isn't true. Camron and Ashley completely shut out the outside world on the bus. Matthew is with the Asian guys and is too big of an ass to talk to anyways. When we do talk it's him making fun of McFly, Tristan and Isolde, Liverpool, or whatever else it is that I like.

I know that it's because some of my old friendships are dying that I can have all these new, wonderful friendships, but it's just hard to let them go. I don't think I should have to let them go. I just don't understand how it all changed so quickly. Change is always going on but why is it that we can only tell the effects until it's too late?

And for all of you who despise McFly, or at least my heated obsession with them and because every time I seem to think about this, this song is playing.

I found something she wrote, long time ago
And it reminds me of a place I know called
Memory lane
We're here again
Back to the days
And I'll remember you always
So much has changed
Now it feels like yesterday I went away

And I would answer all your wishes
If you asked me to
But if you deny me one of your kisses
Don't know what I'd do

So I was PMS-ing at school today. Shayne and McFly kept me sane. blehh

There was absolutely no one on the bus after school today. Andy was off with Amber, Robin had to tape chem, Kathleen had Oracle or something, and even Matthew, who I wouldn't talk to anyways, wasn't there.
So I took a nap while listening to McFly. It just shows how tired I was that I could fall asleep to three guitars blaring at top volume.

Failed another chem test, but that's alright.

Been playing the guitar for the past hour and a half. And sixth period. I can play like seven chords now. oooo I'm working on "All About You"

BLEH everyone was "bleh" today. I don't know what the hell is up with Yogin lately. Michael's always "AHHHHH SAVE ME!!!!". Hayley was gonna cry. Vicki wasn't even there! And then there's Elaine PMSing.

I HEART SHAYNE!!!

I want to go to England.
I want to stay in England.
I want to be in England.
I want to do my internship in England.
I want to go to college in England.
I want to spend a significant amount of my life in England.

I wanted to go to England so badly today in fifth period I practically started actually hyperventilating, not Elaine is excited hyperventilating, but actual breathing too fast because you can't breathe.

*sigh* My mom thinks it's like reincarnation or something. She's like, "You were English in a past life, I know it." Even though none of us are Buddhist.. Tasha says it's Fate because...
1. I found a diary that I wrote when I was five. And the entry in like August 1995 said something like:
I watched a soccer game with Daddy today: England vs Russia (I LIKE RUSSIA too, so it wasn't just like alright just pick one). I wanted England to win! I want to go to England someday. I want to see what it looks like. I want to live there.
And I went on rambling about England for like an entire page and a half. Yes, the ranting was not just a recent development. I had it then too. I was FIVE. I probably didn't know where England was on the map! But ever since then I wanted to be in England!!!!
2. My favorite music is Celtic.
3. My favorite movies growing up were all old English films. That and Disney.
4. Out of all those countries, I somehow picked English football to get into.
5. In the second grade, I wanted the BRITISH to win the American Revolutionary War. I think I almost got sent to the principal's office for that.
6. My first boyfriend is English.
7. BBMak, McFly, Charlotte Church, Celtic Woman, Enya, Busted, Son of Dork, MICHAEL BALL, Daniel Bedingfield, Sarah McLachlan, Sarah Brightman, Kate Rusby.
8. I spell things the English way. It's not MY fault I grew up reading "Jane Eyre"!! "theatre", "judgement", "acknowledgement", etc.
9. Apparently, other than "bloody", "bollocks", and whatever other random British words I use, I pronounce random things their way too. The other day Jen, Robin, and I were at Michaels, and I forgot what it was I said, but Jen just stared at me and was like, "what'd you say?" I repeated it and they were like, "O THAT!" and I was like, "wait? How do you say it?" Yeah...
10. England was the first European country I went to.

There's probably a lot more.

Yes I want to be in England. I am an anglophile. I am a wannabe British person. But it's like.. I want to be there more than I want any flipping guy. Well, maybe excluding Danny right about now because he just said "kisses" like "kishess" and that is utterly sexy, but yeah..

Robin's saving herself for Dougie!
I wanna have sleep with Danny!

Alright not LITERALLY. Well, yes literally. But STILL!

CHEMISTRY

WHEE!!!

PFF AWAY CONNIE!!!
MOAN AWAY ROYSTON!
PLOT AWAY MATTHEW!
DREAD AWAY YOGIN!!
SABOTAGE AWAY ANDY

But Elaine is OBSESSED!!!!!!!!!

DANNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Alright not that great of a picture.

BUT THIS IS HOTNESS, RIGHT THERE. HOTNESS.


AGAIN, HOTNESS

Aww this just makes me laugh:


Football and McFly. Isn't it perfect?

If he could always look like this.. I'd be like... dead

IN heaven. What is it with guys and punk/emo nowadays?

Hmm.. somehow Dougie is a lot more popular than Danny, but there aren't as many individual pictures of him. Very odd.
Dougie is hot though. Even Kathleen admitted it, though she couldn't really tell Danny and Dougie apart somehow... I don't get how that could happen. They look so different. I just like both of them.
One for looks:

One for overall, particularly sexiness of voice:


Damn it VICKI!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think it's FATE trying to tell me something! I keep trying to search for Dougie pictures and all I get are cute Danny pictures. Therefore, he's MINE!!!!!! MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE DAMN IT! I don't care if you saw him first!


Aww


AWWWWW LOOK!!!!!! TOM WAS CUTER AS A BABY!!!!!1


Alright I'm done... I promise.


Wow Danny looks cute in a group picture. That's a first. hehe why does Dougie always look like he's hiding in pictures?

Wow.. I am so pathetically out of shape it's not even funny. I did 50 situps before getting into the shower and my abs still hurt.
I need to exercise/work out/get in shape/whatever it is you call it. Maybe I WILL run tomorrow with basketball... Eh, we'll see how much hw I get.

Just a warning to anyone else who would do this, which is no one but me.
It is not a good idea to go around school with these lines stuck in your head:
We talked for hours
Took off my trousers!

Even IF Danny sounds absolutely unbelievably sexy while he's saying it, it is NOT a good idea to come out of Euro screaming it.

So guys... brace yourself for the newest onslaught of Elaine obsession: MCFLY!!!!
DANNY!!!!!!
DOUGIE!!!!!
Harry!!
Tom.

Yes in that order. See Dougie is the hottest, but then I watched them in concert, and Danny.. *swoon*

Yes Vicki, I remember. Only ONE hour on Sundays...

Harry would be really really hot if he sang (hehe though he is good at "Hero") and shaved the back of his hair.

UH YEAH. I can't sing a G flat either.. A G Flat to an A flat... GAH

So a busy weekend.

Friday night: Amy's sweet 16
Haha ironically ITunes just shuffled it onto "Sixteen Going on Seventeen"

Anyway, it was loads of fun because...
ANDY IS THE BEST DATE EVER!!

So it was at the Yorba Linda Country Club. Royston and I got there around 6:40 and didn't really know anyone. Well the people we did "know" we didn't REALLY know. We kinda just slouched around until Andy came. Amy made a speech and we took lots of photos. Then we ate dinner (I WAS STARVED), which consisted of fancy servings of pizza, fries, chicken, salad, and I think something else. I wanted pasta really bad for some reason though.
After that, we just danced the night away. There was loads of swing songs, just random dance songs like the cha-cha and YMCA, and then the usual dose of hip-hop. Andy and I came up with like... the weirdest dances. We even got ROYSTON to dance... He wasn't very good, but yay he tried! Apparently Michael can't handle spinning in circles. So Andy and I did the Russian, the Robot, the wave, the elaine dancing in circles dance, the "Elaine and Andy" dance (which consists of bopping your head and arms forward violently and then doing the slide slowly in the middle of the dance floor), swing, tango (or a sad rendition of it), slow dance, and just about everything there was. We even attempted to serenade each other to "All I Ask Of You" next to the moonlit swimming pool and tennis courts. Michael got a slow dance with Amy, in which I shrieked and screamed! WHEE!!! We hung out with the Madrids for like half an hour while they were there, which was fun. Andy did plenty of sucking up for some reason. "I think you look nice tonight." or something like that.
Happy birthday Amy!!!!!!!
I got her the Rent DVD, a CD I made for her, with a personalized message as the first track I'm sure she'll be horrified by, and a card.

Saturday night-Sunday afternoon: Vicki's house
THAT WAS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!

I must say something.
If I thought I was a bit touched, I am now COMPLETELY smitten with a British punk band. Yes. You heard correctly. A punk rock band. My favorite member has a LIP RING and bleached hair. (OMG I'M TURNING INTO JEN) But yes... VICKI--I GET DANNY FOR AN HOUR ON SUNDAYS!!!!!!!! DOUGIE IS MINE!!!

Ignoring Connie's "pff"ing and Michael's protestations, I must express:


Aww Vicki!! They look so young and... clean cut in this picture!


God.. if Harry would only be preppy, he'd be FINE!!! Dougie... I like him in that one glasses picture. Danny is hot when he sings..

HEY IT'S OUR GUYS VICKI!!!! NO UGLY TOM!!


Yeah.. I pick the pictures where they're not COMPLETELY punk/weird... Jen would love them I think.

Anyway. So Vicki introduced me to them a couple weeks ago, and I was like, "hot British guys..." and I liked a few songs. Then I go over last night to "work on the Euro project", and we went to see "Just My Luck", an absolutely horrid movie which features MCFLY!!!!
Harry is an idiot!!!
*drops drumstick*
Bollocks!

heheheh.. Dougie wants to see his mum!
So after the two hour movie, we get back to her house and what do we do? We pop in the McFly: Live in Manchester DVD, which is currently being ripped into my computer so it can go on my ipod so Vicki and I have something to do every morning in comp sci.
Well that just set off the flames. Dougie is HOTTTTTTT but when that boy Danny starts singing... *swoon*
My song is... ALL ABOUT YOU!

It's sooooooo sweet!! I think I made Vicki listen to that at least 30 times. I LOVE HOW HE SAYS KISSES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhhh

And I would answer all your wishes, if you asked me to.
But if you deny me one of your kisses, don't know what I'd do.
So hold me close and say three words, like you used to do.
Dancing on the kitchen tiles, it's all about you.

After the two hour concert, we watched the documentary, in which they enjoy stripping each other and watching Tom take a crap for some strange reason. We will just attribute it to the fact that they are guys..
I GET DANNY FOR ONE HOUR ON SUNDAYS VICKI!!!!!!!!
DOUGIE IS MINE!!!!!

Yes Vicki and I almost got into a fight over Danny. He's not that cute, but then he starts singing...

So it's like 12 AM and we're sitting in her room. What was I doing? I know Vicki started interior designing her room (which rubbed off on me because I spent 3PM-4PM putting up 20 more postcards/pictures of Ireland, Japan, France, Monet's water lilies, Liverpool, and quotes on this wall in front of me while listening to McFly) and we basically just lounged around with my ipod blasting into the night sky on her little portable ipod stereo thingy. O yes we had pizza and Klondike bars. We watched the sunrise too!

What is up with me and Vicki? At Starbucks, it was rhyming. At her house it was spelling stuff backwards.

And then, at 6 AM... we went to PEE (no I do not mean urinate to all of those who are on the outside of the inside joke.. basically everyone but Vicki)
I mean, at 6 AM, we went to sleep.

PU TUSH VICKI!! PU TUSH!!!!!! it's technically tuhs but TUSH sounds better!!!

DIARRHEA!!!!!!!!!
DIRARHEA!!!!!!!!!
Tom needs his milk.

Vicki, if I were a guy, I'd sleep with you. (Please don't take me seriously everyone else who is reading this. Actually, Vicki dont' take me seriously either)

What is up with you and guys with those sunglasses Vicki?

You'll be happy to know that we DID get Euro done... from 10:30 to 12:30, while listening to and lookin at McFly pictures. BUT WE DID!!

Her dad wore his Newcastle jersey just to bug me... I must get him back..

Yes now I must work..

This post is dedicated to Vicki!!!

It's your boyfriend!!!!!!



It's your boyfriend with John Arne Riise and some weirdo Asian guy in the background..



Alright this picture just looks SO WEIRD.


Okay fine I'll end with something pretty to look at.



You don't get much prettier than Jude Law.

Alright I felt this blog needed some color..

Yogin--WHERE IS MY COLLAGE DAMN IT

Connie--I'm not even gonna ask.

BEHOLD GOD AND ALL HIS ACCOLADES!!!!



Hehe this is a horrible picture, but Xabi Alonso in jeans... I just had to.


Awww isn't the best passer in Europe adorable?


Yes Xabi, this IS ours now.


AWWWWW IT'S BOTH OF THEM!!!!! Xabi AND Stevie!


Alright I'm done


I promise I'm done... Hmm.. who else can I look up.. tehhe

Not good. I'm developing a Xabi Alonso love... like I always loved him as one of my favorite players, but I'm not supposed to find him attractive!

People bother me sometimes.
Some people bother me.
Some people never bother me.

Like Shayne, Shayne has never bothered me. Shayne is awesome. I BEAT SHAYNE AT NOT LAUGHING!!!!!1 hehehe He will insist I cheated, but I shall never give in to his sneaky claims! heheheh

Like I could ever beat anyone at that game. Yes well it's basically a staring contest except instead of the first one who blinks, it's the first one who laughs.
Yes I know. Elaine could never win.

BUT I BEAT SHAYNE!!

People who go around saying, "LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL" and think they're sooooo hilarious and parade German techno music around in class and never learn the freakin lesson in English class piss me off.
But what pisses me off even more are people who try soooo hard to be like those people. Alright if you're going to be an ass, do it right. There's nothing more pathetic than a wanna-be asshole.

Amy's party tomorrow! Andy is my date! YAY

Michael--look pretty.

CHEATER CHEATER
PUMPKIN EATER

that's out to kristina and yogin

YOGIN THE CHEATER CHEATER
PUMPKIN EATER

Les Miserables meeting was fun today. Got to meet the cast of 33 people, including the 3 little kids who are Young Cosette, Young Eponine, and Gavroche. I now have the script and the schedule. I am not required for the rest of the week. WHEW.

GLLLLLLLLLOOOOORIAAA
IN EXCELSIUS DEO!!!

what the hell was that

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!1

AHHH!!!!!!!!



IT'S ONE OF MY FAVORITE MUSICALS EVER!!!!!!
AND I WILL BE IN IT!!!!!1

I MADE IT!!!!!!!

ENSEMBLE, which means i'll be a random prostitute, but she said I had solo singing, but AHHHH!!!
and more importantly, the thing that caused me to hypeventilate for an hour is gone:
MY DAD SaID YES!!!!!

He hasn't fully understood what he said yes to, but I intend to be so immersed in the play that he can't back out when he does realize. WHEE!!!!

I was bored earlier, though I really should have been playing piano.

My top 8 myspace friends
TOP 8 MYSPACE FRiENDS
1.:	Yogin
2.:	Elsa
3.:	Robin
4.:	Michael
5.:	Jen
6.:	Kristina
7.:	Andy
8.:	Connie
The Questions
How did you meet 6?:	technically summer school before 9th grade. she was in my health class, but we got to be friend's in wilson's 0 period english
Why are you friends with 3?:	because she is a dirty whore with comfortable thighs!
Is 7 in a relationship?:	of course, with me. we established that after the first time i raped him.
Have you kissed 1?:	on the cheek a couple times
Have you hugged 4?:	yes, after his play, even though he wishes it were someone else! *sniffle* *feels unloved*
Have you done anything sexual with 6?:	O yeah. Kristina and I. All the time. Sexual as in... watching chick flicks with ice cream, right?
Would 1 and 8 make a good couple?:	Yogin and Connie... that would be interesting. Hmm.. it's better than some of the other possible pairings off that list.
How long have you know 2?:	Elsa!!!!!! HANNA!!!!!!! Um... it's been almost 3 years now? I WANNA GO BACK TO ENGLAND!!!!!!
Would you ever kiss 7?:	Again, we've raped each other multiple times..
Whats a good memory with 5?:	every memory is good with Jen! disneyland!!!!
Ever hugged 8?:	She doesn't LET ME
Do you love 4?:	Um... "love" is a little far. I heart him and he's a nice guy.
Is 5 nice?:	of course... she's an idiot, but she's nice. hehe jkjk I heart you Jen!
How did you meet 3?:	Robin.. how DID i meet robin? how did we meet? Somehow at Troy.
Who makes you laugh?:	haha all of them. especially elsa, robin, jen, andy (though he makes me angry more than happy.. hehe)
Who makes you smile?:	andy, yogin
When was the last time you saw 4?:	um... friday night, though i'm talking to him right now
Would 3 and 6 make a cute couple?:	HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *falls off chair* HAHAAHAH. Robin and Kristina. WHOO that's funny. Two of the people who insist they would NEVER EVER be lesbian.. and the two most opposite
Does 8 love you?:	connie... i like to think as much as she admits to love
Do you see 3 a lot?:	yes i do. every school day
Describe 4 in 3 words?:	nerdy, naive, sweet (i can't believe i just said that)
What would you buy 1 for their birthday?:	that's a good question... a watch
Have you traveled anywhere with 5?:	Disneyland and to the very brink of sanity.
Do you have fun with 7?:	hahahaha too much fun. THE CONSTRUCTION IS COMPLETE ANDY!
Is 2 a cool person?:	as cool as they come!
Who is the loudest?:	probably robin
Do any of them get on your nerves sometimes?:	michael drives me INSANE sometimes
Do you know when 6's birthday is?:	Of course. January 10
What do you really think of 3?:	she's insane and dirty, but that's why i love her
Best memory with 4?:	um.. rubbing his beard in his face. whee hehe
Does 1 even know you?:	he BETTER know me. i own his brown ass
Is 5 happy?:	um.. generally. and when she's not, i'm here to make her snort! :)
Does 7 live close?:	yup.. about 5 minutes away
Do you have any classes with 2?:	unfortunately no.. she lives too far away. it makes me sad
Have you and 3 ever hooked up?:	of course. i'm with her now. she has the second most comfortable thighs ever...
Are you and 8 close?:	um, not as close as we were, which saddens me immensely, but i'm glad we still talk
Do you wanna kiss 4?:	um please no.
Is 6 a good person?:	hahah immensely. too good
Does 2 own a car?:	not yet! she owns a ship though: the Black Pearl
How did you choose your Top 8?:	um my friends that came into my head, since i technically don't have a myspace
Take this survey | Find more surveys You've been totally Bzoink*d

I really want to talk to someone right now, but apparently everyone has something to do. Yogin's at temple. Jen's buying earrings. Kristina's doing her whole Sunday thing. Hayley's not answering the phone. Even Michael Royston is doing something else; I think he has family over. Kathleen's always busy. Andy's buried under mountains of math hw. Robin's away. I can't talk to Ashley, Camron, or Matthew anymore. I'm going through my cell phone contacts and I don't see anyone.

I should write something. I'm completely wasting my time. I've been sitting in front of the computer for three hours now, and I've managed to only read 30 pages of "To the Lighthouse". That's just dismal.

My mom's out on a date. My dad's working. Even my parents aren't around.

*sigh* I need to be occupied with something. Silence breeds thoughts. Not good.

I want to go to England.
I want to go to England.
I want to go to England.

AARGGGHHHH

Hayley said that if I said it enough times it would happen.
I want to go to England.
Hell I'll take Wales.
Or Scotland.
Even Ireland.
I want to go to England!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bleh, I'm in a weird mood. Virginia Woolf and Tristan and Isolde puts a person in a weird mood. I love the lines in that movie. They're now hanging on my wall, next to Tolkien.

BLAH











Alright I'm done. Back to "To the Lighthouse"

LIVERPOOL WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LIVERPOOL WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SEVEN TIME FA CUP WINNERS!!!!!!!!!!!
After one of the greatest FA Cup finals EVER, Liverpool win 3-1 on penalties after 3-3 regular time. GREAT JOB LADS!!!!!!!! WHEE WE WIN!!!!!! Great job to West Ham. They played so well. I feel bad, but it's LIVERPOOL!! So I'm too busy celebrating. Stevie holds it up!! Just like he did last year in Istanbul with the CL!!!



Our Captain Fantastic Steven Gerrard saved us once again, with an injury time screamer from 35 yards out. Amazing goal, as Royston can agree with because I forced him to watch it. We didn't play the best, but we still won!!! Particularly due to our great skipper. I totally don't agree with this statement, as the entire team was great fighting back, but yeah, some guy on the BBC said this. Alan Hanson or whatever his name was:
West Ham were better than Liverpool. Steven Gerrard was better than West Ham.

Alright great job lads. Moving on now, though we shall celebrate for ages! We'll win the Community Shield too.

"It's in your blood that you want to own me. You're Chinese and I'm Taiwanese."--Andy

So I was telling him how Yogin's parents will kill him if he's seen at school with me, but they allow him to stay out till 12:30 AM with Indian friends. They also tell him to make more Indian friends at school cuz then they can let him stay out more. WTF?!?!?!?
Oh I'm sorry. You're not brown enough to hang out with my son.
Then somehow Andy and I started making fun of it.
me: O I'm sorry Andy! You're Taiwanese! I can't hang out with you! You're trying to break free of China!
Andy: O you're such a rebel! You're trying to own me but you can't! HAH! That's so symbolic! You try to own me but you never can!!! It's in your blood that you want to own me. You're Chinese and I'm Taiwanese.

Alright I found that amusing.

Also, he's a verbal rapist.
O great Yogin adds that I am the physical rapist.
Damn you two!

I went to Michael's play last night: Jack and the Giant. It was SO CUTE!!!!! He was a very good giant--a definite "sensitive brute".
FEE FIE FOE FUM
I SMELL THE BLOOD OF AN ENGLISHMAN

i loved his beard so much I had to rub it in his face incessantly.


it was adorable. Yes and to Michael's family: I AM NOT THE GIRLFRIEND. I WILL NEVER BE THE GIRLFRIEND. I DO NOT WISH TO BE THE GIRLFRIEND!!!!

So the poetry unit in English is all about love and sex, according to Yogin and Sayak. It was so hilarious on Thursday.
Mrs. Madrid: We spent the entire period 2nd period talking about something and I will NOT go down that path again.
someone: What were you talking about?
Elaine: I heard that you spent the entire period talking about love and sex.
Mrs. Madrid: Well Sayak, he kept bringing it up. What else would Sayak want to talk about? He just kept bringing up the topic. It's not like he raised his hand and said, "I want to talk about sex."
Donald: *raises his hand* I want to talk about sex!
Mrs. Madrid like collapses from laughter and embarrassment. When she finally raises her head:
me: Think of it this way, Mrs Madrid. At least he didn't say, "I want to have sex!"
She just about died after that..

Then like five minutes later, the corner of boys: Jordan, Colin, Viraj, and Jesse all wanted to read the poem "The Guitarist Tunes Up" aloud, which is a poem that is completely about sex and how the guitarist plays the woman (the guitar) and it's all sexual. So Mrs. Madrid was like, "How about you read it aloud Colin?" Colin and Jordan get all embarrassed and won't read it, and so someone was like, "Have Jesse read it. He's the cleanest guy in that corner."
Michael Tamplin: I'm the cleanest guy in this class!
me: That's only because you could never get any!
everyone: ELAINE!

Yaeh.. I don't know what got into me that day.

MCFLY VICKI! MCFLY!!!! MCFLY AND CHARLOTTE'S WEB!!!!

O yes and I broke another pair of sandals walking to Starbucks. I sigh.

Yogin, YO QUIERO TU RELOJ!!!!11
I WANT THAT DAMN WATCH!!!!!!!!!

Alright so I took Yogin's watch on Thursday. He completely forgot about it and only remembered when he got home. So all day Friday he kept asking for it and I refused to give it to him. So at lunch, he got ANDY AND VICKI involved. While I unwittingly went to the bathroom, they took out ALL the contents of my backpack, including stuff you don't want to see, stuffed my backpack into VICKI (EVIL)'s backpack, and then ran away. NOT COOL!!!!!!!!!!!! But I must admit, pretty funny. Damn it Andy!
Andy=Ashton Kutcher!
NOT COOL!

O yeah and I had my Les Miserables audition today. It was interesting. I sang "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" because when I woke up this morning I was hoarse and couldn't sing a G, which is basically my middle C. Yes Robin, it's a soprano thing. I probably didn't get a lead, and in that case I won't do it because it's not worth that much time. I really do want to be a musical production someday. I want to know how my voice really is other than my friends telling me that it's good and to shut up already. And because it's fun.

awww I almost forgot how much I love Michael Ball!! Then I listen to Les Miserables... *sigh Marius sigh* Great voice. I think I've made up my mind. Brian Littrell is the favorite voice. Ewan McGregor is the most romantic voice. Patrick Wilson is the sweetest voice. Michael Ball is the most powerful voice. No one can belt it out like he can. Damn....

And of course, there's Andy's great, getting-lower voice. hehehe.

Alright I'm done.

6:55 PM, Pacific Standard Time

If anyone, other than Elsa, can tell me what that's from, they get a prize.

soooooooooo tired!!!!!

Apparently we have an acronym war! I think if Andy joined, he would win.

SO TIRED

*YAWN*

So tired...

I masticated Yogin's locker today! Mr. Castillo thought I was a criminal. Yogin loved it though! Or so he finally admits.. He acted like he hated it though. *sniff* Wouldn't even look at it...
Before you people think anything disgusting, be sure you know what "masticate" means. Kristina will provide you with a lengthy definition and many ways of usage if asked. heheh. NO MENTION OF PANCAKES NECESSARY!

I HAVE AN A IN COMP SCI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHH!!!! A 90.99 but it IS AN A!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHH!!!!!!!! Now all I have to do is do 11 programs and I AM GOOD!!!!!!!

MY TRIG GRADE WILL BE AN A.

IT WILL BE!!!!

Chemistry.. I am resigned to death.

My eyes hurt!!

Yes I DID just get the Green Day CD. No I am not emo. I swear... what a cute English boy can make me do..

This post is dedicated to Vicki.

QUASIMODO IN A TUTU IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN CHARLOTTE SPINNING HER WEB!!!!

Vicki--start doing the Quasimodo in a tutu dance!!!

Quasimodo in a tutu... the next hottest guy ever. HE'S MINE!!!!

I don't mind being Esmerelda if he's Quasimodo!!!!

*swoon*

I can just stare at my blog forever. As we were saying earlier:

me: my blog makes me happy
i can just sit here
and gaze
and be happy
kristina: lol
r u gazing at Royston?
me: whee
kristina: hahaha
me: hahaah yes definitely
kristina: I knew it
ur cheating on Yogin w/ Royston

I heart my blog..

This is what I wrote over the weekend, but Kristina is too impatient to wait for me to finish Yogin's, so here is just Kristina's.

Alright round two: Yogin and Kristina. AWW SUCH AN IRONIC PAIRING RIGHT YOGIN? (Don't hurt me Kristina. I'm merely trying to retaliate to him about the whole debacle.)

Kristina
1. Something random: ANGRY GUMMY BEAR! You are overly-obsessed with your bloody bangs!!!!
2. Challenge: Out-eat me in ice cream! Watch Rent!! But most importantly, stick with your Mormon boys and leave Elaine with her British lads!!!! *swoons over Jamie Bell and Steven Gerrard*
3. Something I like: The Evil Circle being high. Nothing surpasses that. Not even Steven Gerrard's goal against Olympiakos might come near it. Without you, there'd be no evil circle.
4. Color: Gold: Belle. I don't know. Yellow reminds me of you too.
5. Clearest memory: Again, there are so many. Anastasia! Disneyland. Taking random pictures.
6. First memory: There's a random white girl in my health class. In English is when we got to know each other.
7. Song: "At the Beginning" from Anastasia and "Let Me In" from Rigoletto.
8. What I'll always remember: The Mormon girl that jiggles and is fluffy and soft! Ehehe I'll remember a lot more than that don't worry. That tandem story. Skittles. Swapping music. Wheat thins. "Drowning in sorrow."

Sorry I didn't write buckets for you Kristina! You know I heart you though!

HEhehehe I couldn't resist. He's just SO ADORABLE!!!!!

At fourteen, when I first saw him... how old was I.. ten...



It's like he's transitioning:


And now:


This picture is purely for Kristina, because I was against posting this, even though I couldn't really resist.



Robin gave me the High School Musical CD today... eh it's okay. I like his voice.

I have so much to do, yet nothing to do.

I don't wanna do my chem crap!!! But there's nothing else to do! I could go shopping, but then I won't be back in time to do all this chem. What a tragedy. Hmm...

Liverpool finished the season with 11 straight wins!! Cardiff here we come!

Jamie Bell is really really hot.

HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA

THIS IS A CLASSIC PICTURE.

heheheheh

IT SHOULD GO IN THE YEARBOOK!



ehhehehhehehe

IT'S FUZZ!!!!!

To balance out this blog post, I shall now post a picture of my newest discovery. I knew him as Billy Elliot, the absolutely adorable, completely stereotypical english looking little boy. Now thanks to computer science (wow it did something good) he is all grown up Jamie Bell, he's the hot british guy with the extremely attractive northeastern tyneside accent. It's a refreshing change from the northwestern Scouse I'm accustomed to now. It's actually easier to understand somehow. *sigh* King Kong would not be the same without him. He's also the guy in "Wake Me Up When September Ends" music video, which is why that is now on my ipod.

Him in King Kong:




O yeah you like that hair Jen!!!

Alright I'm done!!!! I really want the King Kong movie now damn it..

legovanan
Yay so my first round of 8 questions is for Michael, Andy, and Yogin. Oo three awesome guys.

Royston first then:
1. Something random: You have food in your hair. You spit alot and you need to close your mouth when you chew. (hehe I still heart you, but trust me, when you go on your first date, you need those tips)
2. Challenge: SO PING, Shang's first lesson to you! Be a stronger person and learn to balance your heart and your head. I know that's tough because I can't do it and it takes time. Also, be courageous! Take the initiative! You know boys are supposed to ask girls out! Not the other way around! And stop staring during Euro tests! And and I have a lot more but it said ONE challenge and I've already done like five.
3. Something I like: Even though I just told you to be courageous, you do have a lot of courage already. You say things that I wish every boy could say or would have the courage to say. You're not afraid to spill out your gooey insides, at least to me. Even though sometimes it gets a little too gooey, I'm glad. O yeah, and you're good shade. :)
4. Color: Hmm... this is hard. Hmm... I wanna say that beigish yellow just because all I can think of is that sweatshirt that you were wearing, and I must add: put on BACKWARDS at the end of the AP Euro test today! Yes I saw that! Also I must add symbolic meaning to this because what kind of a future English major would I be without it? It's a pretty color but it often gets lost in the background and unnoticed, but someday someone will notice it! I notice it, but not in that way!
5. Clearest memory: When I think of you I always get the picture of you with that look. The look you get when I just said something incredibly stupid or strange and you go, "What?! Okay, YOU are special." You know what look I'm talking about right? If you don't, ask for clarification and I'll reenact it for you! Hehe
6. First memory: 8th grade honors geometry. You and Victor never shut up!
7. Song: "One Song Glory". You are NOT like Roger, but since we always sing it together and because you love that song, it always reminds me of you (after I stop squealing about Roger).
8. What I'll Always Remember: Your first crush and our experiences through that. Actually, we're still going through that. Well I'm trying to be here and if I'm not doing a good enough job, just conk me on the head and say, "Hey you told me to tell you so I'm telling you!" Just please don't conk too hard. I need these brain cells. They're already pretty fried after all those APs.
I heart you Royston! I'm still here, even if Baskin Robbins is more alluring than Euro sessions! hehehe. And if I tell you you're a pathetic loser, you know I'm just trying to help! Because it's TRUE!!!!!

Andy
Andy, Andy, Andy. What can I say about my beloved Andy? Let us see.
1. Something random: You PMS more than I do and whoever you end up living with must learn not to interrupt you in the mornings. O yes. Sitting in the car with you is called having near death experiences. I hope none of them are death!
2. Challenge: Swirl a goldfish and then eat it! Alright on a more serious note, don't be afraid of telling people and opening up (you know what I mean). We love you and we're proud of who you are. O yes, and you should serenade me more!
3. Something I like: What is there not to like? You're the person I can watch chick flicks with and will go out and buy me a McFlurry at 9 PM and bring it to my house. You're the guy that can stay at my house till 12 AM, even if my dad thinks you're going to rape me. You're the guy that will write a poem for me detailing my insanity and dirty whore-ness. You're the only guy who has ever made me cry out of happiness. You're just... you're Andy and I adore you!
4. Color: O this one's even harder than Michael. OMG I just realized that I don't know your favorite color. Hmm... this is going to sound like an extremely weird choice, but it's good because it's one of my favorite colors! And because the index card in front of me with one of my favorite quotes from the Lord of the Rings was colored this: light turquoise. It's a blend of green and blue. I don't know.. you're ambivalent like that sometimes. I don't think that's something you've heard before. Eh ambivalent isn't a good word there, but I can't think of a better word. What I mean is, you can vary from a deep blue, philosophical and pensive and rather depressed, to a light playful green where we watch chick flicks and squeal over the fact that Jenna and Matt are eating Razzles. Do you understand what I mean?
5. Clearest memory: There's so many! Swirling goldfish. Drunk tired with your hood on, your head leaning against the bus window, sitting next to me, completing massacring some beautiful song that you could sing perfectly if you tried. Then destroying even further, Britney Spears' "I'm Not A Girl, Not Yet A Woman". Hehehe. Then there was that absolutely perfect birthday gift. You made me cry damn it! I don't know which one is clearest. I love them all. Great now you got me all teary-eyed just thinking about it.
6. First memory: At art class, Eva's brother goes to Troy. "You go to Troy? How is it?" And there it began...
7. Song: Hmm... that one is hard too. "Elephant Love Medley" because you sang it and "Your Song" because it just seems to fit you. I know there's something that reminds me of you because of the lyrics. What is it? "There For Me" Josh Groban and Sarah Brightman reminds me of you too. *scrolls down further in itunes*.. "Fields of Gold" by Eva Cassidy ALWAYS reminds me of you. I have absolutely no idea why. But be happy! It's one of my favorite songs!
8. What I'll always remember: Dancing in the rain, singing together, unable to harmonize, my birthday, break, bus rides, Friday nights, life in general. I'll always know (not remember because that means I don't see you anymore) that I know a boy named Andy and he has a birthmark on his face and that I heart him and he hearts me and I'm his backup fiancee who he cheats on his husband with.

Alright Michael is CLAMORING for his so I'll do Yogin afterwards.

Improvised from Andy

LEAVE YOUR NAME AND...
1. I'll respond with something random about you
2. I'll challenge you to try something.
3. I'll tell you something I like about you.
4. I'll pick a color that associates with you.
5. I'll tell you my clearest memory of you.
6. I'll tell you my first memory/impression of you.
7. I'll tell you what song reminds me of you.
8. I'll tell you what I'll always remember about you.

I just have to say

IT'S OVER!!!!!!!!!!!
NO MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NEVER MORE!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHH YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NO MORE FREAKIN JAVA CODE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I CAN DIE CONTENTED!!!!!!!!!!

Wow I haven't posted this much in a LONG TIME!!

It's not a poem because there's absolutely no rhyme or not even any rhythm. We usually go for rhythm, but this is just an emotional blob that attempted to be artistic.

Every day looking to you for hope.
Every day sent crashing down.
I live in a memory
Your ghost I cannot banish
Haunting me, teasing me
Warmth and smiles it offers
Solitude and pain it yields

Why do I still think of you?
Why do I see through him to you?
Why is your face the only one I see in the crowd?
Why does a smile from you to someone else
Burn within me in a jealous flame
Why is a smile from you to me
Hoarded like a precious jewel
Why do the sun in moon rise in your eyes?
Why do I dream of soft whispers and softer kisses?
Why do memories of you blur my mind?
Why does every love song sing your name?
Why is every couple holding hands you and me?

What is this vise you have upon me?
Why can I not break free?

Why do I still think of you?
Why do I still want you?

I really should study for Euro. I really should. And finish this load of chem homework that I loathe.

King Kong in Comp sci!!! Finally, I'm actually kinda starting to like that class!

How the hell we'd wind up like this?
Why weren't we able
To see the signs that we missed
And try to turn the tables
Now the story's played out like this
Just like a paperback novel
Let's rewrite an ending that fits
Instead of a Hollywood horror

Wow.. I've quoted Dido, Michelle Branch, and Nickelback all in one night.
If I ever finish this chem hw, I might even post the poem I wrote today. That is, if it starts looking like a poem instead of Elaine scrawling her thoughts in English and not paying attention to Iran's nuclear weapons that Gleb went on about.

These last few days have unleashed a monster within me. (Kristina--this is fresh off reading Edward's tale.. I WANT MORE DAMN IT!!!!!!) I even started writing poetry again. Jen, you might be happy. I'm in the perfect mood to finish Forsaken, but I have homework. Damn that inspiration-stifler.

And when we meet
Which I'm sure we will
All that was there
Will be there still
I'll let it pass
And hold my tongue
And you will think
I've moved on

I will go down with this ship
And I won't put my eyes out and surrender
There will be no white flag above my door
I'm in love
And always will be

What is wrong with me? Damn it!!!! I didn't need this to happen to me. All I've worked at comes crashing down. It's like Edward. 200 years and she walks in the door and it's all gone. I want Edward damn it. I wanna be Bella!

Could you look me in the eye?
And tell me that you're happy now
Would you tell it to my face?
Or have I been erased?
Are you happy now?

GO AWAY DAMN IT!!!!!!!! JUST GO AWAY AND LEAVE ME ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!

Why is it that every time the Evil Circle gathers, there's always a plethora of pictures?
This blog is now like the Evil Circle Gallery.
So we went to Starbucks to resolve our issues. We ended up taking really stupid pictures, laughing till our nonexistent jiggly abs hurt (well at least me and Kristina. damn jen and her weight training), and I think most everything is well now. Kristina and I spent the entire afternoon together today without Jen, but we heart her! We're trying to solve our problems, even though mine is unsolvable and hers just takes a lot of courage on her part, which we're instilling in her gradually, hopefully, I think.

Hey Kristina:
little pellets of cancer!

Alright so on the way there, I make a declaration when I see a flower sticking in the straw of a Chipotle drink. I was like, "WHOA! ART IN THE MAKING!!!" Apparently Kristina and Jen didn't agree with me, but I insisted on taking a picture. Though JEN officially declared it "not art dear", she ended up taking multiple pictures.




Yes we are weird. So I got Baskin Robbins and they got Yogurtland. We sat down in front of Pick Up Stix, which is not Chinese food I must add. I find it highly interesting that in a supposed "Chinese" restaurant, every employee is Mexican. I was gonna go up to them and order in Chinese, but I don't eat that stuff anyway.
So for those of you who didn't see me yesterday, I was EXTREMELY ALLERGIC. GOD IT WAS HORRIBLE!! I think Elsa and I are somehow allergically-connected, because every day she seems to be having a horrible allergic reaction, I am too! STOP HAVING ALLERGIES ELSA!!
So Jen and Kristina found it highly amusing to take pictures of me sneezing.
Jen calls this the turtle face:


This was painful!




I have no idea what she was doing:


On the table there was a chopsticks holder thing and it had a silver ring on top. We had lots of fun with that. Good friends can have fun anywhere.


She's Sherlock Holmes!

And Jen is Watson!

AKA: Wannabe Sherlock Holmes. HAHA I just called Jen a wannabe Kristina!

It's a monacle!


Then Jen discovered chopsticks:

White person with chopsticks...

She's trying to eat me!


Somehow my nose is now food.


I have to post this, just because it's the most sullen I've ever looked in a picture, so I can prove it to Shayne that I can be sullen!


This is what a white person ends up doing with the chopsticks:


SHE'S A VAMPIRE!

AHHH EDWARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I look retarded:


Yes that ended our little escapade.
IT'S AN OASIS!!!!!

Cancer pellets!