Elaine is gearing up for TWO long, emotional/philosophical rants.

Brace yourselves.

It's interesting how much can change within six months. How many friends fall apart, how many people you don't talk to anymore, how many new people you're friends with. You look back on notes, pictures, blog posts, and just other memories and it's just incredible how different things are.

I've asked around and everyone notices but no one says anything. We never play cards anymore. That fell apart after Camron and Ashley got together, because you can't really play cards without Camron. Then the whole Elaine-Matthew debacle shot a freakin nuclear bomb through the group. We didn't like being at the table at the same time, and so I actually went to my clubs and he went more and more to his new asshole friends. And yes they are assholes. I respect Michael Tamplin's intelligence more than anyone else's, but I don't respect how he acts. Gleb is the same. He can be a really nice guy, but when they're together they're so freakin stupid. "LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL" with a stupid look on your face. How much more messed up can you get? O yeah, I'm going to slap myself for fun when people are annoyed with me and blast German techno on every speaker available and reassemble comp sci computers so that Diana's doesn't work anymore. Somehow they are attractive to Matthew. Whatever floats his boat then.

I remember when we couldn't all fit at the table and we used to yell at each other to move over or squeeze. I remember when I had to fit my huge ass between the two seats. That's how crowded it was. Now, I go there and it's only Michael. So when I get there, I drag people there. Shayne's been sitting with us the past two days because I've dragged him over. Yogin's there if I'm there usually. Andy turns up once in a while when he has no where else to go. Robin doesn't come over much from the badminton people because Jeff Bosboom somehow thinks he can turn up there now and be stupid. Vicki turns up sometimes. But it's just not the same. I mean I love all the people there, with the exception of Bosboom, but it just isn't the stupid, eclectic group it was. It's just a bunch of my friends tied together loosely in this big conglomeration and the only thing they have in common is that they go to Troy and they like to make fun of Elaine, which is fun but still.
Not to degrade any of my new friends because they are awesome like no other. Shayne is the most awesome person alive. I would so marry him just to talk to him, as weird as that sounds. I just like being around him because somehow we always have fun, despite our polar opposite personalities. Actually, I think it's because of it that we do. I don't know what I'll do next year if he's not in my english class. He's like the one person always completely capable of making me giddily happy without even trying. According to him, he just insults me because somehow I get angry/offended and then three seconds later I'm hysterically laughing. I so do not agree with that statement! Vicki is one of my closest friends now in all her blonde glory. She's awesome and I heart her. Amy is the most eclectic person I know and we can talk about anything and though we rotate around completely different spheres, we get along.

All my old friends are still somewhat tied together by the bus. But even that isn't true. Camron and Ashley completely shut out the outside world on the bus. Matthew is with the Asian guys and is too big of an ass to talk to anyways. When we do talk it's him making fun of McFly, Tristan and Isolde, Liverpool, or whatever else it is that I like.

I know that it's because some of my old friendships are dying that I can have all these new, wonderful friendships, but it's just hard to let them go. I don't think I should have to let them go. I just don't understand how it all changed so quickly. Change is always going on but why is it that we can only tell the effects until it's too late?

And for all of you who despise McFly, or at least my heated obsession with them and because every time I seem to think about this, this song is playing.

I found something she wrote, long time ago
And it reminds me of a place I know called
Memory lane
We're here again
Back to the days
And I'll remember you always
So much has changed
Now it feels like yesterday I went away