I hung out with Andy today at Starbucks. Kathleen was supposed to come, but she had to babysit. I convinced her to bring Derek along and just give him a video game sedative, but then her dad made her watch him for even longer or something. Andy got there a little bit later than me because he assumed I'd be late. HAH! I win. We got frappachinos because we're fatties and sat down to talk. I think the two highlight stories were:
1. Our Kathleen imitation
2. The Brian story

1. I was telling him about how Kathleen and her mom were arguing over her future career choice, and, mostly unconsciously imitating Kathleen (I wasn't actually trying to imitate her, but I was narrating her speech), I said slowly, wide-eyed to place emphasis on what I was saying, with one hand on my chest, in the way Kathleen does, "But Mom! I have to do what calls to me."
Andy laughed so loud and so shrilly (and ended up snorting tehehe) that the entire Starbucks stared at us, which was saying something because it was already pretty loud in there and we'd kept up a pretty consistent decibel level the whole time. I stared at him, understanding that what I had just said was pretty cheesy, but surely didn't merit such unparalleled laughter.
Still struggling to control himself, Andy said, "It was just the way you said. It was SO Kathleen!" and then began doing his own Kathleen imitations, which rendered me completely defenseless, falling off my chair laughing. See Kathleen? Even when you're not there, you light up our lives. :D
We then talked about how Kathleen's parents want her to go to med school, but she wants to do psychology, and then when her mom asked her what she was "passionate" about, what she "dreamt of," she (I can just imagine) said, wide-eyed and sincerely, "Dance."
That sent Andy on another fit of laughter. "This sounds like the beginning of a dance movie! Like Jessica Alba in 'Honey.' It can start out like that, and then Kathleen will fall in love with some hot black guy."
"And her parents will disown her," I added.
"Yeah, and then she's being all sexy with her dancing. Can't you just imagine Kathleen doing this?" Andy demonstrated, which almost made me die.
"And she teaches all these little kids because she loves them!"
"Yeah, she teaches little kids to dance and ends up planning this huge sexy dance finale that's a great success," Andy extrapolated. "And right when she's going to break down, she sees her mother in the audience, and it's this great climactic moment. And it just ends like that, with her gaining her parents' approval and doing this sexy dance."
"Oh my god. That is so terrible," I could barely make out the words, laughing as hard as I was. "That's so cheesy... but perfect."
In a moment of sheer brilliance, Andy said, "OMG IT CAN BE CALLED 'XU-T FOR YOUR DREAMS!' Get it? Like XU-T? AHAAHAHAAHAHAHAA"

Yeah. That's going to be our life project. Right there. I love puns. That and Andy's "DOOR-ANGE" key. :D

2. I told Andy about how Brian came on AIM yesterday in the middle of the night in Korea and asked me to call his mom and tell her that he'd been throwing up and had really bad stomach pains and thought he was dying. :( Poor boy.. he's okay now, which is good. But I had to call his mom, who is here, because he doesn't have a phone, which was slightly awkward and very interesting. We had serious trouble understanding each other. I was like, "Umm.. hi, Mrs. Kim. This is Elaine, a friend of Brian's. He asked me to call you because... etc," I said, probably too fast out of nervousness.
"What? Who?"
I said the whole thing again, hopefully slower this time.
"Wait.. who is sick?"
"Brian. Your son! In Korea!"
"Brian..?"
"Yeah! He's sick right now and he wants you to call his grandpa or something.." I said. (At this point, Andy suggested that they'd already forgotten about him because they'd shipped him off to Korea.)
We finally got each other to understand, and I called her again later to relay more messages from Brian, and then called her later to ask her if he was okay.
But according to Andy, I should have just spoken Korean. The four Korean phrases I know are: "Hello," "I love you," "Stupid!" and "Do you want to die?" I'm sure that would have gone over well.
"You should have just been like, 'Do you want to die?' but instead of YOU, your SON!!!" suggested Andy. "And instead of do you WANT to, he IS!! Your son!!"
Oh language barriers. How hilarious you are. It's like how my aunt told someone that her necklace was made out of preserved "beef bones" that one time..