Happy New Year everyone!!!!

Well, almost. Just in case I don't post again or something... I say it now.
As for me, I welcome in the year with much trepidation. I am both fearful and excited. This is the year that has always been, I guess, the boundary of my future. When I've thought of the future, 2008 was always the year looming boldly ahead. 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, it's difficult for me to even type them--that's how unaccustomed to them I am. The future seemed to be 2008. That's it. And now, the future is becoming the present and I don't know quite how to feel.

Haha it would've been good to finish apps before the new year. Well, I still have 2 hours left. But the thought of going to college and leaving home is so scary and so... wrong, almost. I've always lived here, in my two-story house in Chino Hills with my teddy bears and with my daddy. My entire life story has unfolded within these walls. I can't imagine leaving them. Oy. Getting teary just thinking about it.
I wish I could stop being lame and think of it as an adventure, as the next chapter, and be excited, but that's one of the most irritating things about me. I always have to harp on what's past, many times at the expense of what's actually occurring. It was really depressing talking to a lot of my friends and asking where they were applying to. We had almost no schools in common. Jen, Kristina, Vicki, Shayne, Royston--there's absolutely zero chance that we'd end up together in many cases. I'll never forgive Shayne for not applying to Cambridge. Oh, and now that I think of it, I should be hearing from them "early January", so one of these days... great..

Jen called yesterday and asked when we were going to hang out for the umpteenth time, and we finally decided on a day, and while talking, we realized that it'd been more than a year since I last really hung out with her and Kristina. That was a very depressing moment. I always have to say, "uhh umm... I have _____" or "sorry!!" to everyone and I feel terrible, and I wonder whether I'm going to be a workaholic someday with no time for anybody. But it just makes me even more grateful to have friends who still call even though I haven't picked up or I haven't been able to hang out for ages, who haven't given up on me and moved on. Thanks guys. :)

And of course, as we do every year, New Year's Resolutions:
1. Be a better friend. Actually have time for people and not take people for granted
2. Be a better editor
3. Not lose my temper and take it out on Yogin randomly when I'm stressed
4. Be nicer to my mother
5. Not be so demanding
6. READ MORE
7. Improve Spanish
8. Think of more to post :)